OMFG! Totem loves the modern world! He has never paid for his beloved
XXX-porn, has a dicey online casino infatuation, consumes technology like bandwidth grows on trees. And, he is so vain he follows himself on
social networks he hasn’t even, like, signed up for yet! When he is not
running from his bookie, the bank or his over-inflated sense of celebrity,
he is out there serving as a symbolic reminder of the world in which we must eke out our small, self-celebrating lives. Totem enshrines the evils of vanity, technology, lust and greed and wards them off as like, protection and stuff. Besides, in the 21st Century he has like, (totes) hit a real purple patch.